[kitaek27]

Or am I supposed to say, "Its not you, its me?"
I think this whole status thing is causing a lot of problems for me. People aren't seeing me as they used to anymore, and they don't see the real me.

This post is really long, so for impatient readers, go ahead and skim instead.

Let me get something straight. I think I'm overrated. For someone as pathetic as me, this much power might be too much. But I have applied and recieved the responsibilities, and my judgements are being trusted. I do what I think fits my job descriptions best.

When I was 14 years old, I first become severely addicted forum whoring (gaiaonline, legendaryfrog), and when I joined Hidden-street forums when I was 16, I began to find extreme amounts respect for the moderators.

I don't remember his name anymore, but he was well known for moderating lots of Maplestory forums, and was a reknowned hacker who always go around Nexon's protections. He was so... pro at everything. Everyone talked about him as if he was their great leader.

At the same time, I'm sitting my ass around with nothing to my advantage to become even remotely close to this guy. I knew how to use html and bbcode. I have intro level knowledge of C++. I can use photoshop well. Basic things most people in the adult world in the computer field all know.

It all started with the introduction of the WIKIs. Back at the time I could really care less about MabiGuru and MabinogiPlayer and whatever other junk websites popping up. My home was Mabinogiworld. I wanted to help out with the wiki, so Uchocobo made me wikimod (btw, the only power that gives me is to edit locked pages and ban people from wiki edits). With plagiarism and fansite hate going on, I joined Mabiguru and Mabinogiplayer to establish a solution (and failed miserably).

I felt bad about joining the sites for this single purpose, so I became fully active here (I'm a forum ***** so there really was no problem). When Nexon forums made me "Honored Member", I was really happy that the hours I've spent answering questions and making guide was being recognized.

I enjoy answering questions about Mabinogi. With 5 years background experience, its something I'm actually good at. Something people don't really know too much about. Arcane Knowledge, was what Mabinogi was two or three months ago. I am fully aware that in a few more months, everone will know everything I already know, and I'll blend into the background of the crowd where I am no longer special.

With the activity I put into these forums, and the Honored Member thing going for me, I guess I got the plus I needed become a moderator here. Contrary to what you all might think, I did NOT do much sucking up. Only a week before my application, I had an argument with several staff members (including the admins) of Mabinogiplayer and Mabiguru about how its being run.

Heres my greatest reason for being a moderator. I have a MISERABLE pet peeve chilling down my spine when I see a thread that is out of place. I have a BURNING hate for threads that are found in the General Discussion pages saying "lol, when dos da seal stonez open?!" when theres 4 other threads about it right below. Since I'm on forums with most of my free time, I'm usually the first to see these. All I can do is report it and wait.

I have not "abused" my power to a great extent, contrary to some beliefs. Please excuse my "censorship" actions taken earlier. I thought it was the best option, because if anyone had to reveal info about the site's sale, it would be Itchy's responsibility. Before that, I've only banned one account ever (advert account), and I've never deleted threads, but rather lock it or reason with the creator. Maybe its because I have too much time on my hands (which shouldn't be, since I'm an AP student), I talk to the members who were supposed to be banned by the rules, and try to change their ways before any actions are taken. Please note that flaming a mod is taken care of in the same way we take care of members of flame a member. Settle personal problems against ANYONE in a PM, rather than using the boards. We will not discriminate, we will not give anyone advantages.

I think with all the popularity I've built up, and the power I have, people are viewing me similarly to the way I've viewed that one great mod I looked up to when I was 16. People expect things of me, people joke about my awesomeness.

I am a member of Mabiguru before a moderator of Mabiguru. I am a 18 year old highschool student before I am a member of Mabiguru. If I have something to share with my friends (guides, pictures, youtube videos), I will post them in several different forums to make sure that all my friends will see it. Its not an attempt to raise my post count (its on different sites anyways so it really doesn't seem to matter).

Where is my place? Where is my "Loyalty"? I love Mabiguru. I've put at days worth of hours into posting and moderating in this site. Its become a great site that I can be proud of moderating. The forums itself, in my opinion, have exceeded Mabinogiworld.

But my home is still Mabinogiworld. Why?

The friends I have made there BEFORE my ascention to power still see me as who I am. They don't see me as "the moderator of _____", but rather see me as "that silly Kitae, going off causing havoc again". They don't say "I love this, Kitae!" when I do a guide, but rather "I can do better~~~" and we would start a competition of some sort. They'll never make me a REAL mod, there are people better suited for the job there.

I'm still a fresh newbie mod. I ask around my other friend moderators who have had more experience what to do. Sometimes, my judgements are wrong. But I try.

I've had a thought or two about resigning my position here. Of course, even if I did, I wouldn't quit the site overall. And don't worry, I won't blantantly quit moderating (I'm just saying I've had thoughts). I would never live with myself seeing bad threads exist and not be able to do anything about it.

So there you have it. The extremely long, boring, and pointless story of KitaeK27. I hope some of you have a better understanding of me now. I hope that you can all realize us moderators are people too, living dull lives behind a computer, filling up as statistics on the world's economy.

Now its your turn. What can I do to improve and better fit your expectations? What do you want the mods of MabiGuru to do?

If I have done something wrong in the past, then please tell me. This is a open suggestion thread. I will not hold anything against you, so open up. In this thread, anything said against me will not be edited, removed, or punished. J...just don't do it anywhere outside this thread, or I'll have to treat it as a flame/spam.